So this is what happened.  On Friday Sushi Attack was supposed to come and visit the bay area for the weekend.  But due to rain, his flight to SF was canceled.

The compromise?  Vegas.  I scheduled a last minute flight on southwest to Las Vegas, and Sushi Attack parlayed his SF ticket to a vegas weekend.

One thing - Southwest is pretty sweet.  I scheduled a ticket two hours in advance to Las Vegas for about $150, which isn’t bad at all.  They flight was a bit delayed, but still, the convenience of easily schedule a flight last minute was valuable.

Southwest has these commercials now that compares the airline to a private jet.  Although sitting on the floor to get a good spot in the ‘B’ line, and squeezing between overweight middle americans is a far cry from a G4, they flexible schedule, pricing, and refund policy is great.

So we stayed in the New York, New York, which is a decent but unremarkable hotel.  Once you get over all the new york stuff, it’s really just a hotel with pretty nice rooms and an average casino.  Drink service there was pretty quick and efficient though.

This weekend actually turned into an eating extravaganza.  We went to Nobu in the Hard Rock, Thomas Keller’s Bouchon restaurant in the Venetian, and the Bellagio buffet.  I’m in the airport now so I don’t have great access to my pics, but I’ll follow with pics and reviews later.

As far as gambling goes, we learned how to play craps this weekend and this consumed a lot of our time.  It’s a crazy game when you get into it, and you can really have huge swings and big wins.  I would be down by hundreds at times, then in a few minutes be even.  But of course, I eventually lost it all, even after several trips to the ATM.

I have to say though, I love vegas more than anything.  The weekend was short, I am absolutely exhausted and a couple grand lighter.  But it was totally worth it.

I mentioned Kitchen Nightmares last week, and it premiered this Wednesday.  This show is an import from the UK, and I watched several episodes of the European version and it was pretty good.

Kitchen Nightmares stars chef Gordon Ramsey, who also stars in Fox’s Hell’s Kitchen.  Ramsey is a Michelin star-winning chef that has restaurants worldwide.

In KN, Ramsey goes to failing restaurants and tries to improve them.  He will try to improve just about everything - the food, obviously, but service, decor and marketing as well.

The first episode takes place in Peter’s Restaurant, a family-owned Italian restaurant.  The co-owner of the restaurant, Peter, is a character.  He’s a stereotypical italian wanna-be mafia character with a bad temper.  I’ve been watching the sopranos and thought this personality was more hollywood than anything, but this guy really plays the part.  He dresses like a gangster, drives a black Benz, and constantly fights with people who ask him for money.  I don’t know if this is a typical italian personality, but if it is, it’s a horrible thing to deal with.  Plus this guy is huge, so no one really is able to calm him down.

And the thing I hate about Fox is that they really focus the show on this guy’s personality.  The only thing they show Ramsey doing with the actual food is changing the serving portions to ‘family style.’  They don’t show how he changes the existing recipes or anything, which is a major focus of the european version of KN.  Really fox just turns the show into a mix of Jerry Springer and a restaurant reality show…and it’s kind of a shame, but probably more appropriate for the Fox prime time audience.

Ramsey does make some changes with the kitchen, like cleaning up the walk-in and bringing in new equipment.  He also gets peter to work in the kitchen for a while to make him understand what it’s like to be a cook.

But really the biggest problem with the restaurant is Peter and his horrible personality.  And they try to make it seem like Ramsey fixes this, but I doubt it.  And that’s another thing, Fox really glossed over the results of Ramsey’s work.  They leave the final five minutes of the show to showing results, and most of it is this asshole Peter holding a party in a park.  Really kind of ridiculous.

So, the show was a disappointment…but it’s not really surprising.  Fox is not going to show a true cooking show.  They kind of reduce Ramsey into a drill sergeant character, and that’s that.  And it’s a waste.

Any one else catch it?  Let me know.

If you want to understand why I am so dissatisfied with pizza in Hawaii, all you have to do is look at the picture below.  It’s from the homepage of the the largest local pizza chain in my hometown.  It’s good pizza, but not the best in the area.  It’s also not the cheapest.

Also, I feel I should mention, here is the text and photo from the buffalo wings menu:

“Our plump and crispy chicken wings are served with your choice of Buffalo-style (mild, medium, hot, or XXX), barbecue, or garlic.

1/2 Dozen - $3.25

One Dozen - $6.50

Small Tray of 50 - $24.95

Large Tray of 100 - $47.99″

I guarantee that these wings come with two things: a side of celery sticks and Bleu Cheese Dressing.  Why bleu cheese instead of ranch?  Because we’re not savages.

What some of you may not realize is that where I’m from, every town has at least one restaurant that does nothing but buffalo wings.  That’s why I bitch when the best I can get out here include the word “teri” somewhere in their description.

Today the world of fantasy lost it’s greatest author since J.R.R. Tolkien.  Robert Jordan, author of the eleven volume series “The Wheel of Time” passed away from a rare blood disease.  He was diagnosed a year ago, and, from all appearances, was getting better.  That makes his passing even more shocking to those of us praying for his recovery.  He was only 58 years old. As a two-tour veteran of the Vietnam War and a graduate of The Citadel, he was not your typical sci-fi nerd. And he wrote about war and death from the perspective of a person who has experienced it firsthand.

I know this probably seems insignificant for anybody who hasn’t read his books, however, you have to understand that many of his fans have been reading “The Wheel of Time” for over a decade.  The series is unique in that unlike most other long fantasy series, Jordan did not create a few central plot threads that span the series and then use each installment to create and complete a variety of minor plot threads.  Rather, he has kept his plot threads open and alive, literally dozens of plotlines and hundreds of characters, throughout the series.  “The Wheel of Time” is, essentially, one enormous story.  Regardless of your taste in reading, or opinions of high fantasy in particular, there is no way to read his books and not be convinced that the author is a genius.  One would have to be to be able to so intricately maintain and develop an entire world, distinct cultures, a system of magic so detailed it functions with rules and reason and its own internal logic - like physics in a way, through out thousands of pages of writing.  And his work was no common rehashing and renaming of Tolkien’s work, like the vast majority of high fantasy.  It was unique and creative in a way that no other author of the high fantasy genre has been able to achieve.  Tolkien’s greatness is equal to Jordan’s only because Tolkien was the first to accomplish a creation of this magnitude.

When I learned this morning that Robert Jordan had passed away, I felt a rather unexpected sinking feeling in my stomach. I still think I’m in shock. With the sense of despair and loss the thought that shot through my head was “Did he finish book 12″? This made me feel like a bad person. Because, and this is the cruel twist of Fate’s manicured hand, Robert Jordan was working on the final volume of “The Wheel of Time” when he became ill. It is not completed. The final volume promising to bring together over fifteen years of story won’t be written by the man who planned it. It will not be the same. It really can’t be.

This made me feel like a bad person at first. But upon further reflection, I don’t think it should. I feel like I know Robert Jordan. His work and his world have been a part of mine since I was 17 years old. What greater complement can a fan have for an artist as to feel genuine sorrow at the loss of the artist’s work? Or the knowledge that the work will never be completed, at least in the way that only the artist himself could?

Rest in Peace, Sir.

P.S. - Once I get to the “anger” stage of my grief, I’ll have some words about Punahou and Hawaii’s alleged “small town mentality.”

With the recent posts here about football and small towns and the beginning of the fall TV season, it seems like a great time to talk up one of my favorite new shows from last year. Friday Night Lights was a good movie with Billy Bob Thornton in 2004, but it became a phenomenal television series with NBC and Kyle “I was in Early Edition” Chandler last year. Okay, first thing’s first — it’s NOT all about football. This show does such a phenomenal job of showing life in a true small Texas town. I’ve met a fair number of kids from around the area where the show takes place, and let me say, this does a good job of underscoring the way that everyone focuses their attention to high school football, everyone knows of everyone else, the smallness of the town, the overt religious faith, and, of course, the racial tensions.

Okay, maybe I’ve done a piss poor job of talking up this show. It’s not high brow. It’s not low brow. It’s just a really solid show that does a great job of portraying small town life, how awkward teenagers can be, and how good, realistic marriages operate. And, it just gets you right there. And it’s not melodrama, damnit. It got poor ratings last season, but thankfully NBC realized it had a quality show for once and renewed it. If you’re home on Friday nights (yes, they finally realized that maybe a show named Friday Night Lights could have some mirroring), watch it on NBC Friday nights at 9/8c.

Another Woot! Off is going on folks, and this one started off pretty good.  They had a desktop mini fridge - a must have for work, and a decent 8.1mp camera for $140.

I picked up the Nokia 770 Internet Tablet.  Apparently you can walk around your house and surf the web with wifi with this thing - seems pretty cool.  We’ll see if it’s just a waste of money or not.

Yesterday, California’s largest Whole Foods opened in Cupertino, California - a few miles North of San Jose.  I went to this place today, and it is absolutely enormous.

Basically, just think of any normal Whole Foods, and imagine each department expanding by a factor of 10.  The wine section is huge, and the store features a large japanese food section with freshly prepared teriyaki bowls, yakitori, and pre-made sushi.  There are  also large buffet sections for ‘world’ cuisine, salads, soup and chili.

Hmmm, what else?  There is a cafeteria-style restaurant, and a large area for food samples.  They also have an oil tasting area, and a training area where I think they give cooking classes.

There is also a clothing section which is surprisingly large.  They have lots of hippie clothes made of random organic threads and stuff - I mean, that’s kind of a waste of space in my opinion - who really buys clothes from Whole foods?

I went there for lunch today, and got some of their fried chicken.  I got two fried chicken breasts and some rice - a generous lunch but nothing out of the ordinary.  This meal, however, cost $11, which was a total rip off.

That’s one thing about Whole Foods - it costs to eat organic shit.  And I’m not really convinced that it’s worth it.

I would suggest waiting a week or so before you visit, however.  Yesterday during the grand opening it was so packed I could not even find parking.  Today, it was still packed and generally uncomfortable to navigate - even without a cart.

In any case, if you’re in the area, you really need to see this place.  It is awesome to shop there - and their selection is excellent of course.

Nor my pants.

By what standards should we judge our treatment of animals?  State law, federal law, god’s law?  Does it matter if we’re in rural Virginia, New York, Hawaii or Indonesia?

The answers to all of these are yes, and therein lies the problem.  Standards for the treatment of animals vary widely among different races, cultures and upbringings.  A rural, or in this case, inner-city upbringing seems to create a lower standard for ‘ethical’ treatment.

JakGrabbit would never fight dogs, and for that matter, neither would I.  I believe it is cruel and inhumane…but that’s just because I was raised that way.  Being raised in a relatively well-off neighborhood gives you the luxury of respecting animals, because, ironically, for us they are entertainment - they do not provide labor or sustenance.

I think it’s OK to purchase a dog like the animal is an object, and I think it’s fine to enslave said dog into a life of doing stupid tricks for my entertainment.  And if some shoes are eaten, then maybe the dog will get a slap or two.

But I also realize that for some people, a dog is literally a piece of meat.  For some people, animals do not have feelings and can be killed for sport or entertainment - even if they are cute.  And while I would not do that personally, I realize that this is simply a byproduct of our background.  It would be unfair to impose my upper-middle class, TV-dinner from Star Market background, on someone from, say, a small rural town in Virginia.

Yes, we would hope that Vick’s wealth has produced a stronger sense of decency.  But I think we should also understand that people are raised to view animals in a certain light - and if you’re raised to see animals as a utility, then a $50 million football contract won’t change that.

Frankly, we’re lucky if we can successfully create standards for the treatment of human beings.

And that’s where we really need to think about the Vick case.  I do think Vick should go through whatever legal proceedings are applicable to this case - I’ve never wavered on this.  But what is really going to matter here is the, sigh…court of public opinion.

The NFL is a public organization that is highly aware of public opinion.  We can simply disregard Vick as an asshat piece of shit, because he is a millionaire and pro football player.  Or we can try to understand where he’s coming from.

Look, I’m not one to quickly give second chances, but millions in fantasy football dollars are at stake here.  If Vick’s career is ended on this, be clear, it is ended because people are not willing to understand that animals are treated differently by people of different backgrounds.  They are making this into a personal matter, portraying Vick as someone who is evil, when really, it’s just a difference in viewpoints.

Sure, there should be a universal, objective standard as to how we treat dogs, cats, bunnies, hamsters, spiders, roaches and herpes.  But right now, there is not.  And until that point, we should hold off judging others by our personal standards, and instead realize that our viewpoints are not universal, may not be ‘objectively’ correct, and may be subject to the bias of wealth.

I was a vegetarian for ten years.

There.  I said it. 

But I got over it.  I eat meat now.  I love meat (mostly, I still draw the line at veal).  I also love leather.  While I don’t hunt, I’ve got no problem with it.  I actually respect skilled hunters and fishermen.  They’re the best environmentalists I’ve ever met.  Real environmentalists; not pot-smoking white kids with dreadlocks.  God, I hate hippies. 

That being said, I have to explain also that I hold more contempt and burning hatred for PETA than pretty much any other organization out there.  Their hypocracy and idiocy is astounding.  One simple, and quick example of which, is that their Senior Vice-President, MaryBeth Sweetland, the second in command of an organization that advocates not just pure veganism, but also the abolition of zoos, aquariums, and even seeing-eye dogs, is an insulin dependant diabetic.

That’s right.  She uses a producted developed by animal testing and still made directly from animal biological byproducts.  Cute little bunnies have to die so she can eat her doughnuts.  Does she see anything wrong with this?  No.  She says, “I’m not going to take the chance of killing myself by not taking insulin. I don’t see myself as a hypocrite. I need my life to fight for the rights of animals.”  That’s right.  SHE’S not going to die.  Your loved ones who need that research or medicine?  Them dying is okay.

I fucking hate PETA.  I hate them SOOOOO much.  Campaigning for your cause by comparing cattle slaughterhouses to the Nazi Deathcamps?  By showing side by side images from the two above mentioned locales?  I see a big difference, PETA.  One is a pile of dead HUMANS!

Now that I’ve gotten that out of the way:

Michael Vick is a piece of shit. 

It’s one thing if you are unemployed in Waianae and chicken fighting is your only source of income (which, for you Punahou grads, you realize is typically about $300,000 for the house per major tournament).  Michael Vick is already a millionaire.  He’s not doing it for the money.

And he’s not from a foreign culture that has some ancient tradition of dog-fighting as a means of connecting with your gods or ancestors, or where your pit-bull’s fighting strength is the only means for the women of your village to measure your virility.  He’s a pro football player.  He has a mansion.  He has at least two sports cars.  When he even thinks about possibly getting an erection, there is a long line of beautiful women waiting right there to pounce on it.  He’s not fighting dogs because of the nobility of the sport.

He’s fighting dogs because he’s a bloodthirsy asshat who revels in watching two animals rip each other to shreds.  At least in a cock fight, the birds attack each other because that’s what they do.  They are cocks afterall.  Dogs fight because they’ve been abused, tortured and to please their owner. 

I’m truely disturbed by Mr. Adamus’s assertion that Michael Vick “did not hurt anyone.”

Ahem:

Having been involved in the rehabilitation of fighting dogs, let me tell you, there are few things that make you hate humans more.  I can only think of one other job; child protective services worker. 

You are absolutely right.  Vick did not rape or kill anybody.  That’s true.  That’s a far worse crime.  He didn’t drive drunk.  Also true, but I’ve lived in Hawaii for too long to convince me that most of you think THAT’s a mortal sin.  Unless having a glass of water before you leave the bar negates that crime . . . .

Michael Vick does not have a hobby that is “hypocritically considered by many to be cruel.”  He has a hobby that is, unequivocally and completely objectively, cruel. 

If you’ve ever had a pet dog, that you raised from a puppy, I think you would be lying to tell me that you’d put him or her into a ring to get torn to shreds.  That you’d enjoy seeing that.  I suspect, however, that you’ve never had a pet.  When you see how much pain and fear these animals experience, you really should feel something other than pleasure. 

I have no problem with killing animals.  If it’s for a reason beyond entertainment.  See?  Now I’m not a hypocrite.

Okay, so here are some photos of my cats. Puma’s on the top row. Right now he’s chilling in our bedroom. Bono is in the bottom row. Now, Bono’s the newer cat, but he gets most of the house to roam around. You know why? B/c he cries and cries and cries if he’s put into a room alone. He’s a total lap kitty, and if there’s a lap, he’s jumping into it. All 14 lbs of cat and claws. He’s crying less and less, which is good, so the socialization process is coming along. Puma’s still an affectionate lap kitty, too, but unlike Bono, he doesn’t cry that he’s cooped up in a room. He does enjoy sleeping on the bed with us and occassionally waking one of us up to pet him. And, as you will all be pleased to know, his fur is as soft as a bunny’s (R.I.P. Max the Aloha Rabbit).

Two things I learned while taking these photos — cats don’t like the flash on cameras and they move faster than my old Canon digital Elph. This just makes me think it’s even more of a time to get a new camera.

Well, my days of adventure are over with the Honolulu Police Department.  Unable to adequately perform the Vascular Neck Restraint in a Control and Arrest Tactics practical exam, I was cut from the program.  

Boo hoo.

In celebration of this inadvertant victory over my own stupidity in career choice, I have been drinking and eating a lot this past week.  Here’s a run down of my recent Japadamus related experiences (I can only think of two at the moment):

1. Harpo’s Thai Marinade/Dressing:

 I started using this when I first came to Hawaii, a pale, poor, and pretentious law student, too good to even attempt a Spam Musubi.  I use the verb “using” because this marinade is more like a drug than food.  But unlike most drugs, which have an opposite effect, this one makes you very, very fat. 

I put this on grilled chicken over white and brown rice (mixed).  That’s it.  It’s really freakin’ good though.  It also has 150 calories per serving.  130 of those are from fat.  I went down three belt sizes while at the Academy; one week and one bottle of this stuff later, I’m back to where I started.  Rock on spicy peanuts!

2.  Suntory Single Malt Whisky “Yamazaki” 18 year:

I promised I would try a Japanese whisky and give a review.  I actually bought this months ago, but only this week finished off the bottle.  (There’s nothing like raiding Karazhan while drunk on Japanese whisky while yelling “Fucka RYU!” over Ventrilo.  If you understood that last sentence, congrats!, you’re a fuckin’ nerd too.)

There’s really only one thing I can say about this whisky:

It smells like bananas.

I’m not kidding; you open the bottle, pour a glass, and it smells like fake banana flavoring.  Like the banana pieces in a bag of Runts. 

It doesn’t, however, taste like bananas.  “It tastes like burning”, to quothe the poet Ralph.  It has a weak flavor, but an unusual spicyness.  Is that word spelled with an “i” in the middle?  The spiciness (don’t like the way that looks, we’re going back to the “y”) lingers for a while after a sip.  I’m pretty sure that rice is used somewhere in the crafting process of this whisky, it’s too smooth, almost vodka-like, in it’s flavor.  I like to spell that word with a “u”.  Flavour. 

So it’s not really bad.  In fact, unlike most whiskies, I could probably drink this whole bottle in one sitting and it wouldn’t make my stomach explode.  I used to be able to do that with Jack Daniels, but I’m too old and delicate for that now.  But, at the same time, because I’m looking for a high quality in a small quantity, I wouldn’t pick this whisky.  Maybe it’s because I’ve also discovered islay scotch, but I wants me some peaty, smoky flavour in my beverage. 

So what I’m saying is that if high quality single malt whiskies aged for more than 16 years are types of Biscotti:  Suntory is Pocky.&nb